to your mother

THOUGHTS ABOUT BEING A MOTHER AND LOVING A MOTHER...FROM A MOTHER OF TWO.







Monday, April 25, 2016

This is Big News...You May Want to Sit Down for This


 Mom's new glasses 4/2016

9.5 years ago Mom had a major stroke. Click HERE  to read a little more about that.

4 years ago Mom was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma. Click HERE to read up on that. 

For 9.5 years Mom has worked like a stubborn ox to care for herself.

For 9.5 years Dad has been an advocate and cared for Mom - from her funky toenail all the way to her chemo ravaged hair...and every inch in between.

9.5 years of being at home, independent, has been a gift for us all, especially Mom, who we weren't even sure would come home after the stroke.

All that said, it's time for the next episode. We have found a fantastic assisted living facility for Mom to live.

Before I go on, any thoughts/questions of 
"Did you think about...?"
"What about...?"
"Could you...?"
"Does she...?"
"Why not...?"
no worries. We have asked it, pondered it, explored it, researched it, thought about it some more and cried over it. As a family - we don't like this choice so much, but we feel it's the best choice for Mom at this point. As I said to Mom, sometimes life doesn't look like we want it to, but it's the way life is suppose to be.

What we like: 
                       Mom can be as independent as she wants to be on a  daily basis - on a great day she does it all - when she's not so great she can have the assistance she needs.
                        Mom has a two room suite, furnished with her own furniture and kitsch.
                        When we went for the tour we heard laughter in the hallways, the 9:30am activity was an ice cream social, and we enjoyed a home-cooked meal for lunch in the sunny dining room.
                        The facility's philosophy is the facility is everyone's home and all the residents are family.
                        Mom's furniture was moved in last Thursday and and she checked in on Friday. Since then Mom's mood has been up and down as to be expected. The dining room, a usually quiet place, suddenly sounds like an elementary school cafeteria when Mom rolls in. She waves, hoots and laughs with others as she wheels to her table. Mom has also been known to roll real fast down the hall to catch up to someone to say "LO!" and she's greeted with "Hey Peggy!" as most of the residents somehow know the name of their non-verbal neighbor.

People, we are not joyous, no way. We are still processing this huge transition and we will all have ups and downs throughout this process. We are happy that Mom is safe and she seems to enjoy uplifting others...something that she has always done, right? Mom has always been gifted and talented when it comes to persevering and making the best out of yucky situations...yet another lesson we can learn from Mom.

P.S. We are still working on the minutia of Mom's move. Feel free to continue to send stuff to the house until we figure that part out. Dad will be sure to get whatever you send to Mom...unless it's really heavy...like a fridge...he won't take that to her.